I thought I was the Brain...then realized I was Pinky

I thought that today, for your elucidation and entertainment, that I would post the statement of purpose I wrote for NYU. Luckily (for me) I reread it before posting--and realized how unintentionally hilarious it is. Though it will never see the light of day, let me assure you, it's bombastic, solipsistic, and at this stage of my life, highly embarrassing.

It's also kind of interesting that my current research topic has only the barest resemblance to what I enthused about in the statement of purpose. I knew then that I wanted to focus on curriculum models, and that is in part what my dissertation is about. However, everything else is completely different:

Statement of Purpose	Actual Dissertation
Goal: To design curriculum	Studies currently used curriculum
Focus on issues of race and class	No such focus present
Investigate curriculum's impact on students	Investigate curriculum's impact on teachers
Based on theoretical work by James Banks, Ruby Payne, and Paulo Freire	Based on theoretical work by M.M. Bakhtin, William Pinar, and Elliot Eisner
Research design would involve the design and testing of a curriculum	Research design involves teachers talking about their current curriculum
Extensive, multi-year study	Research period is seven weeks
Curriculum of concern is that used in Title I schools	Curriculum of concern is that used in a summer residential program
To design and complete a study worthy of a Research I institution	To design and complete a study without humiliating myself
Delusions of Grandeur	Nightmares of never finishing